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Penguin Life Chum
The platonic life pair consisting of Sir Oliver Francois and Brackets (Jim); Penguin Life Partners. Professions of (platonic) love between the two members created the acronym ILYNTW, as well as its response, ILYNTWT. AS OF DECEMBER 8TH, 2011 THIS LOVE IS NONPLATONIC AND THE TWO HAVE ENTERED A RELATIONSHIP FRAUGHT WITH DORKERY. Origin It was many and many a year ago, in a kindgom by the sea -- wait, it started on Tumblr. On September 21st, 2010, Sir Oliver asked Brackets to be his (not original) penguin life mate. Brackets, of course, said yes. When it was decided that all penguin life mates would get a new title, they decided to make it Penguin Life Chums. The term "Penguin Life Chum" was suggested for two reasons. The first reason was that "chum" is an incredibly fancy word. The second reason was that it was a play on words. Both Brackets and Sir Oliver are fond of puns/plays on words. When it was all said and done, they pranced around the Yada board proclaiming their (NTW) love. Dwelling Oliver and Brackets live in an electric blue sea anenome in the town of Rock Bottom. The Daleks from Victory of the Daleks, painted many colours by Oliver, roam around the house serving tea. The living room of the sea anenome is decorated with Kate Beaton prints. The walls are a brown and tan damask print. The floor is purple shag carpeting (who cares if it's hard to clean?). There is also a totally mollusk disco ball. Book shelves line the wall and the furniture is Art Deco. There's a vintage record player and tons of vinyl. The walls are filled with ironic posters (50s sexism, Soviet propaganda, etc.). Their bedroom is very crustacean. They sleep in bunk beds (Jim; bottom, Oliver; top.) and the bunk bed has a slide. The room has many beanbags. THE BEGINNING OF THE RELATIONSHIP OF... AWESOMENESS, I GUESS THURSDAY, DECEMBER 8TH 2011 Isidore: Hypothetically Isidore: If I were to ask you out as a serious thing, what would your reaction be Jimboree: Well, I would be happy. As I'm sure you know, my only real issue is that I'm so much older than you (even though with your extra maturity and my lack of it it doesn't really seem that way). Isidore: Yeah I know that is an issue for you but um, would you say yes despite that and we could work through that? Hypothetically.... Jimboree: I'm sure we could. ...As long as you're not trying to trap me for To Catch a Predator. Isidore: Haha. Isidore: Well, not hypothetically now, if I were to ask you out RIGHT THIS SECOND, would you say yes and could I change my Facebook status because that is VERY IMPORTANT? Jimboree: Yes. Yes. And then Isidore devolved into a neanderthal with TOO MANY questions. They both flailed. Bromances They Resemble Oliver's counterpart is listed first. Fictional *Sherlock Holmes and John Watson (Sherlock Holmes) *Spock and Captain Kirk (Star Trek) *Shawn and Gus (Psych) *The Master and The Doctor (Doctor Who)* *Harry Potter and Ron Weasley (Harry Potter) *Voldemort and Quirrell (Harry Potter; A Very Potter Musical) *Jeeves and Wooster (Jeeves and Wooster) *Joey and Chandler (Friends) *Arthur and Merlin (Merlin) *Hiro and Ando (Heroes) *Patrick and Spongebob (Spongebob Squarepants) *Bert and Ernie (Sesame Street) Real Life *Friedrich Engels and Karl Marx *While this is questionably a bromance, this list required a ''Doctor Who reference.'' Quotes Jim, "WHY IS THIS HOUSE SO AMAZING? It contains things I didn't even know I wanted until just now." Jim, "Canada's more like secretly badass. We have all these amazing rights that no one knows about." Oliver, "That is so like Canada, too." Jim, "And yes, Doctorism would be an excellent religion. I know for a fact it's already impacted my moral code." Oliver, "I feel like we're taking a step in the right direction more and more everyday." Jim, "You could sell souvenir buckets for your creys at your concerts." Oliver, "We need a Brack signal." Jim, "What, to get me on IM?" Oliver, "Yeah. Just flash it over your apartment..." Jim, "If you can find a light strong enough to shine from Texas to Ontario..." Oliver, "The light of my love." Jim, "Why can't I see it?! D:" Oliver, "You just need to OPEN YOUR EEEEEYEEEES. I SEE. YOUR EYES ARE OPEN!" Fun Facts *Their song is Always by Erasure. *Their second song, describing the fact that they do everything UNDERWATER, is Underwater Friends. Sir Oliver's Rap for Brackets On 2 October, Sir Oliver returned to the Yadathread after a brief hiatus and, at 8:24 PM PST, posted the following rap he had written for Brackets while he was away: I'm reading Homestuck, And it's just your luck, I'm writing you a rap, Drawing it out like a map, I love you NOT THAT WAY, And I just wanna say, You're the best PLC a yada could ask for any day, We're tight like skinny jeans, Three sizes too small but what does it mean? We're mind twins, We're penguins, Forever 'til the end, If you want to break us, You might as well give up, We're attached for life like platonic soul mates, Isn't it great? I don't care that you're Canadian, You're still pure WIN, If I had a TARDIS, you'd be my companion, Like Amy Pond, Just don't try to snog me, I'll punch you so hard that you can't see, But I still love you, What else can I do? You're my Penguin Life Chum, We're stuck like gum, So don't worry, You're still my bucket keeper, You can roam around with my buckets like a creeper, I know CM's been stealing your thunder, But you haven't committed a blunder, I only use that bucket to crey over him, It's overflowing so now it's sink or swim, Grab my buckets, dear, Please bring them here, I will fill them with my tears, Over the fact that you felt so unneeded, I'm carving this in stone so please read it, You will always be my PLC, This sick rhyme is for you to see, Take these words to heart, Our souls will never part, We're penguin bonded, If I yelled, "Expecto Patronum!" you'd be my patronus, So don't doubt us, We're tight like a troll and their lusus, We're Sherlock Holmes and John Watson, The original bromance, We're my OTP; you better believe it, Our platonic love makes the shippers go batshit, My dear Watson, you don't need to be a detective, Without your friendship, what kind of life would I live? But if somehow we feel apart, I'd need a doctor to fix my broken heart, So don't let us grow away, I'll do my part so thay we stay; Best friends forever, Penguin life chums, No one can replace you, You're number one. Brackets' Drawings for Sir Oliver In return for writing such a beautiful song, Brackets drew some pictures of the twosome for Sir Oliver. The first depicts the Chums as Sherlock Holmes and John Watson, who are pirates who have sailed on the Salty Yada to Antarctica to feed penguins. Oliver appears as Sherlock, and Brackets appears as John. Apparently Brackets also has a "thing" for cable-knit jumpers. Pun Times Together Ollz: YOU CAN CALL ME DETECTIVE PUNLOCK HOLMES Jim Jam: AND DOCTOR JOHN WATSPUN Ollz: SO MUCH BETTER THAN MY PUNSON Jim Jam: THAT IS WHY I MAKE THE PUNS AROUND HERE Ollz: WELL I GUESS THAT MAKES ME REPUNGNANT Jim Jam: OR RE-PUN-DANT Ollz: ARE MY LACK OF SKILLS REPUNDABLE? Jim Jam: I NEVER WANT A REPUND ON YOUR WORDPLAY Ollz: I STOLE THEM FROM THE PUNSAURUS ANYWAYS Jim Jam: DID YOU ROB THEM AT PUNPOINT? Ollz: I EVEN PUNNED THE TRIGGER Jim Jam: YOU DESPUNRADO, YOU Ollz: I'M THE BADDEST PUNDIT Jim Jam: I'LL GET YOU A BOTTLE OF SARSPUNRILLA Ollz: OR MAYBE A BOTTLE OF YOUR FINEST ALCOPUN Jim Jam: I'LL RUN DOWN TO THE PUN AND GET IT FOR YOU Ollz: JUST DO IT IN A FASHPUNLY MANNER Jim Jam: OH, I WILL. WANT ANYTHING ELSE WHILE I'M THERE? STEAK ON A PUN? Ollz: MAYBE SOME PUNLESS RIBS AND A BASKET OF PUNION RINGS Jim Jam: I'LL JUST PUN DOWN THERE AND GET THOSE THEN Ollz: THANK YOU. JUST LET ME GET OUT ME PUNEY. Jim Jam: NOPE, THIS PUN'S ON ME Ollz: EVEN FOR SUCH A PUNRESPECTABLE MAN AS MYSELF? Jim Jam: OF COURSE. YOU'RE LIKE A PUN TO ME, MY BOY Ollz: PUNCLE, YOU'RE LIKE THE FATHER I WAS PUNLUCKY ENOUGH TO NEVER HAVE. Jim Jam: AH, YOU YOUNG PUN-KS WARM MY HEART Ollz: OR MAYBE IT'S THE PUNDY. Jim Jam: AL PUNDY? OR TED PUNDY? Ollz: I HOPE TO PUNSUS NEITHER Jim Jam: YEAH, TED PUNDY ISN'T THE KIND OF GUY YOU'D WANT AT YOUR PARTIES Ollz: YOU COULD SAY HE'S NOT EXACTLY THE LIFE OF THE PUNTIES Jim Jam: THAT PUN WAS SO BAD, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO GO TO CHURCH ON PUNDAY TO MAKE UP FOR IT Ollz: I HOPE I STILL GET SENT TO PUNVEN OR EVEN PUNGATORY Jim Jam: YOU'D BETTER HOPE SO. THE PUNGEONS OF HELL ARE PUNGENT TO SAY THE LEAST Ollz: WHERE IS MY GUARDIAN PUNGEL WHEN I NEED THEM? Jim Jam: PROBABLY ANSWERING EVERYONE'S PUNYERS Ollz: NOW THAT WAS JUST PUNFUL Jim Jam: I KNOW. I SHALL HAVE TO DO YEARS OF PUNANCE FOR THAT ONE Ollz: I HOPE YOU CAN MAKE UP FOR BREAKING ONE OF THE TEN PUNMANDMENTS Jim Jam: THE PUN-ISHMENTS WILL BE SEVERE, BUT I WILL ENDURE Ollz: CAN I SUGGEST TO YOU TO BUILD UP GOOD PUNMA? Jim Jam: I'M GOING TO HAVE TO IF I WANT TO BE REINPUNATED AS SOMETHING GOOD Ollz: I CAN ONLY TELL YOU TO ASK FOR PUNDANCE FROM YOUR SPIRIT PUNIMAL Jim Jam: I'LL HAVE TO GO ON A VISPUN QUEST Ollz: I THOUGHT THAT WAS ONLY FOR PUNCES AND NATIVE PUNMERICANS Jim Jam: I GUESS I CAN'T, THEN. DON'T WANT TO COMMIT CULTURAL APPUNPRIATION Ollz: I'M SORRY. MAYBE YOU CAN MEDITATE AT A PUNCTUARY? Jim Jam: PERHAPS. I MAY HAVE TO STOP BY THE PUNNERY AND SEE WHAT THE SISTERS HAVE TO SAY ABOUT IT Ollz: OR MAYBE THE SHEPUN CAN HELP YOU. JUST ASK HIM TO OPUN HIS BOOK OF KNOWLEDGE. Jim Jam: I WILL ASK HIM. MAYBE THERE IS SOME HELPFUL ADVICE IN THE GOSPUN OF JOHN Ollz: JUST HAVE PUNTIENCE AND YOU CAN BE SAVED. Jim Jam: I WILL PRAY TO THE FATHER, THE PUN, AND THE HOLY GHOST FOR GUIDENCE Ollz: AS LONG AS YOU ADMIT YOUR PUNBLEMS YOU WILL NOT BE SPUNNED Jim Jam: PRAISE PUNSUS. I DON'T WANT TO END UP FACING SATPUN ON JUDGEMENT DAY Ollz: NO, I DON'T THINK YOU'LL MEET PUNCIFER. YOU'RE NOT THAT DISPUNSTING. Jim Jam: NOT EVEN AFTER ALL THESE PUNS? I DO WORRY ABOUT FACING ALL THESE DEPUNS Ollz: TOO BAD WE'RE NOT IN SUPUNATURAL WITH THE PUNCHESTERS TO HELP US Jim Jam: AND THEIR IMPUNLA Ollz: THE METALLIPUN Jim Jam: I DO NOT KNOW ENOUGH ABOUT SUPUNATURAL TO MAKE MORE PUNS D: Ollz: WELL BEFORE WE MOVE ON, LET'S NOT FORGET THEIR TRUNK FULL OF WEAPUNS Jim Jam: ARE DEMONS SUSCEPTIBLE TO PUNS AND BULLETS? Ollz: ONLY IF THE BULLETS ARE PUNNED WITH ROCK SALT. Jim Jam: I DID NOT KNOW YOU COULD EX-PUN-GE A DEMON WITH SALT. LEARN SOMETHING NEW EVERY DAY Ollz: YOU CAN'T. YOU STILL HAVE TO PERFORM AN EXPUNCISM BUT IT DOES HURT LIKE HELL. Jim Jam: WAS THAT AN UNINTENTIONAL NON-PUN PUN? Ollz: I BELIEVE IT WAS PUNINTENTIONAL Jim Jam: AH, YOU ARE A TRUE MASTER OF THIS PUNOMENON Ollz: THE WAY YOU FLATTER ME IS PUNBELIEVABLE. Jim Jam: I AM A PUNSTOPPABLE FLIRT, MY DEAR Ollz: CAN YOU HEAR MY HEART PUNDING? Jim Jam: SIX WAYS FROM PUNDAY Ollz: IT'S BEATING LIKE A PUN Jim Jam: DUE TO MY PUNRESISTIBLE CHARM? Ollz: YOU KNOW I'M PUNDICTED. Jim Jam: BECAUSE MY LOVE MY LOVE MY LOVE IS YOUR DRUG~ Ollz: C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER Ollz: IT WAS PUN WHILE IT LASTED Jim Jam: YES IT WAS. I SUPPOSE YOU ARE THE PUNGEON MASTER OF THIS CONVERSATION Ollz: THANK YOU, KIND SIR. I WON'T TAKE ADVANTAGE OF MY PUNDERS. Jim Jam: GOOD. YOU MUST RULE THE DENIZENS OF PUNLANDIA BENEVOLENTLY Ollz: I'LL TRY TO TAKE GOOD CARE OF MY KINGPUN AND MY PUNJECTS. Ollz: ARE YOU STILL PUNCTIONING? Jim Jam: YES Jim Jam: I THINK MY DEFEAT AT YOUR HANDS HAS RENDERED ME PUN-LESS, THOUGH Ollz: WELL AT LEAST YOU DIDN'T PUN AWAY. Jim Jam: I WILL NEVER PUN FROM YOU Ollz: HOLD ME, JIM. HOLD ME UNTIL WE'RE PUN. Jim Jam HOLDS OLLZ '' Ollz WEEPS IN HAPPUNESS Jim Jam HAS A DIRTY MIND AND LAUGHED AT THAT Ollz EDITTED IT SO IT DOESN'T LOOK SO PUNNY Jim Jam STILL SAW IT Ollz KNOWS BUT WE CAN PUNGET IT Jim Jam RECORDS IT FOR HISTORICAL POSTERITY '' Jim Jam: PUNSTERITY? Ollz: PUNSTERITY IS PUNTASTIC Jim Jam: KIND OF REMINDS ME OF MONASTERY, THOUGH Ollz: PUNASTERY Ollz: WITH PUNNHA Ollz: AND HIS PUNKS Ollz: AND THEIR PUNHAWKS Ollz: I MEAN WAIT Jim Jam: OKAY, NOW I'M THINKING OF PIRANHA Jim Jam: WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY BRAIN Ollz: PUNRANHA Jim Jam: DEADLY BEAST OF THE AMAZPUN RIVER Ollz: EATING THE AMAZPUNIAN WOMPUN Jim Jam: AND MEN. PIRANHA DON'T DISCRIMINATE Ollz: THEY CHOMP AT PUNIS AND VAGPUNA And then we died. See also *Penguin Life Partner *Penguin Life Mate Category:Relationships Category:The way of yada